Trust

Isaiah 55:8-9 says, "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."


Trust is something that God has really been impressing upon my heart lately. How much do I trust God? Do I say I trust Him but then show the opposite when I face difficulties? And has my perception of trust been skewed by the imperfections of this world? This entry probably isn't going to be "organized" and it might be difficult to follow, especially for those of you who don't think the way that I do. :] However, there is quite a bit swirling in my head so I'm just going wherever with this. Warned in advance. So with the issue of trust also comes the issue of contentment for me. Is Jesus really enough for me? If I had nothing else in this world, would I be satisfied with "just having Jesus?" God has been taking me through some pretty difficult things this past year. There is a situation I'm currently in that is probably one of the hardest situations I think I've ever dealt with. Definitely not the hardest situation ever, but it ranks up there pretty high. Sometimes I find myself thinking, "Yeah but God if I only had ______ I would probably feel better." or "If I could just ______then  I would be happy." ...Yeah no. That's not how it is. God is showing me that I will never be happy until I learn to fully trust and rely on God, casting all my cares on Him. He has shown me time and time again that I can trust Him, even though He doesn't have to prove anything to me. I get so frustrated at times because I know all of this, but I still lack in complete and total trust. [You can pray for me, seriously].


I look at the situation I'm in now and I think at times, "God, why did this have to happen? Why do I have to deal with all of this pain? This hurts too much." But then I realized-how much more does it hurt my Savior every single time we sin? Every time we deliberately disobey His will? Every time that I know I can trust Him, but don't? Every time that I try to do my own thing instead of following His flawless plan. Yeah, this situation hurts right now. I hate it. But once again I am reminded of the promises in the Bible that we will walk through trials and temptations, but we are not walking through them alone. It's easy to trust God when everything is going the way I think it should go. But that's the problem. Things aren't always going to go the way I want, and praise God for that! I can't even imagine how miserable my life would be right now if God had answered every single prayer that I have ever prayed the way I wanted Him to. I don't see eye to eye with my Creator, and sometimes I would rather attempt to take things into my own hands [which never works out well] than to trust God to bring me through situations, and trust His hand. He knows what's best. I don't. Psalm 118:8 says, "It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man." Lately I've realized just how much faith and trust and confidence I put in people. While it is important to have people in my life that I can come to for various things, I should always put God before people. Always. My trust in people shouldn't even be comparable to the trust that I have in God. People are going to disappoint me...they already have. It's a part of life unfortunately. However, if I am able to trust people who have flaws and imperfections, then how much more should I trust Jesus, the Author and Perfector of my faith? (verses here). James 1:12 says, "Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him." I think that at times I focus too much on the trial and not enough on the crown, the glory after the hardships. I don't know how long this trial is going to last. But I need to remember that the pain now can't compare to the joy that's coming. The crown comes after the trial. And God isn't going to leave me through it.